Why does the flower keep blooming? Why does the dove fly? For some, as in my case, because it is my nature. I've been hearing music in my head for as long as I can remember. In fact, I distinctly remember being put down into my crib, and wishing that a certain wind up toy that played music wouldn't be wound up so I could keep hearing the music inside instead of that! - Even though I liked it - it wasn't as amazing!
I made the choice to learn the language of music in order to share the music inside of me so I wasn't the only one to enjoy it. At the age of three I knew beyond a doubt that the oboe was the instrument for me to "speak" in this language and playing it was essential to reading and writing the language.
It's a work in progress of course. As I explained to my mother earlier this year after I completed my first original full orchestral work (as opposed to an orchestration project) that although I've been "drawing portraits" ie, composing for many years, finally I am at the point where when I "draw a portrait" it finally looks like what I see; ie the music I compose is finally sounding more like what I imagine from the inside.
This is just the beginning even though this is a journey I've been on for many years. Only now do I feel like I can write what I wish! One reason why I take great care of my health is so I can live longer in order to write out what is inside of me bursting to come forth.
Musically yours,
Kathryn